Sae - A little bit of me, A little bit of life

Saturday Fever

One long and half wasted Saturday later, I sit upon my throne, typing nonsense into the new blog. Not much to say and even less to read.

I'm sewing a blanket for somebody. I started off with the idea of it going on granddaddy #1's bed at the nursing home. Grandmama #1 decided that she would rather put a large afghan on his bed. Well, I figured then maybe I'll put it on my dad's bed at the nursing home. It's an olive green fleece that I'm using a tight zig-zag around the edges to hopefully get it to last a long time. I know next to nothing about sewing but am learning my way around. I also have some fabric that I want to use to start a cubby-hole quilt. I can come up with fifty gazillion different projects, get all the stuff together and then let it sit for months until I finally get around to doing them. Always putting off today what I can put off tomorrow too.

I made up the spaghetti sauce today. It took a while since I was using frozen tomatoes from last year. I've finally come up with a flavor I like. Being a person of not much taste, it took me awhile to get turned on to meatballs. They do flavor the sauce like nothing else! The spaghetti is for my dh's birthday dinner tomorrow. I even broke down and made a chocolate cake from scratch. I just don't do it anymore. I just don't have the umph to get into the kitchen and do this stuff. I hope it's not the depression setting in again.

We have my nephew, APC, staying the night with us. He is constantly on fast forward. He's a good boy, just really into everything. I guess being 3 yrs old will do that. (lol) My kids were hellions and still are. I only hope that when they go to somebody else's house, they at least remember to wash their hands after they pee. I gave up on them acting like real humans a long time ago. (more lol)

I didn't go to the nursing home today and tomorrow doesn't look promising either. It's just so dang hard to deal with gd#1 wanting to come home so bad. My dad really never went through that phase. Dad was more of the aggressive type. He would rather take a swing at you than beg to go home. I can handle the hostility better than they constant tearful begging. My gm#1 is always torn up by it. I've told her a million times that if I could bring him home, I'd be at the nursing home now with bells on. We both know this. Maybe I'm just saying it to ease my conscience. My gd#1 was/is my #1 gd. Now it's just like with my dad. I know it's not the same person anymore. If gd#1 was in his right mind (what a phrase!), he wouldn't do this to himself, his wife or the rest of us. I tell him over and over again that he was so very sick for so long that he doesn't have his strength. Pneumonia (sp?) and anemia will kick anybody's butt but it will do so especially to an 85 yr old.

On to email silences.... don't you just hate sending an email to a friend and not getting an answer? It just kicks my paranoia in overdrive. Did I say something wrong? Did I not say something when I should have? Do I even know if they got the email and it's not lost in email hell? Any normal person probably wouldn't let it bother them. Other people have other things to do, they have a life to live and families to take care of.

I'm such a needy person.

This is your friendly yet paranoid neighborhood dingleberry signing off..... Coberae