A Roller Coaster Ride

It's a roller coaster ride.

Good moments, bad moments. Happy one minute, sad the next.

On the up-side, I am happy that I got to go out with a friend of mine tonight. We talked for over 3 hrs. We were celebrating her birthday on one of our Vent, Rant and Rave nights. The food was good but the conversation was better. There's nothing like being able to talk to someone who is not related to you and not 'in the loop' constantly. I hate that she has problems but to listen to them keeps me from thinking of my own. We had a really good time. I wasn't happy for the waitress whom we kept a table from but hey, I compensated her well for her time. I gave my friend a calendar that tells her how to get in touch with her inner bitch. It was just funny. My friend is one of the least bitchy people I know. She's very kind and compassionate. She just needs a reminder once in a while that it's ok to bring out a can of whoop-ass. She is about 8 yrs older than I am but we get along great. Everyone needs a person to lean on and she is my in-person lean-on lady.

I bought a cd today. That is quite out of character for me. I like music but not so much of a fan of it to buy cds like they were going out of style. It was the soundtrack to Queen of the Damned. It was a cheesy little vampire movie but man I loved the music. My music changes to my moods. Some days it's country, some it's classical, hard rock from the late 70s or the middle 80s. I'm not sure which category this music comes from, maybe a goth type thing? All I know is that it speaks to me at times when I need to get in touch with my inner wickedness.

Speaking of inner wickedness, I realllllly wanted to jack-slap my great aunt today. I bit my tongue, only on the request of my grandmother (it would be her sister-in-law or my granddaddy's brother's wife). That nosey old busy-body biddy was all in my face today, several times. If it had been genuine concern for my granddaddy, it wouldn't have been a problem. She just wanted gossip. I love good gossip but she just went about it in the rudest way. I wanted to put her in her place but grandmama said no, I need to keep the peace. I told grandmama that I would keep the peace, it would just happen to be a piece of her hide nailed to my wall. I came home from the nursing home (where she and her husband where visiting my granddaddy) and called my sister. It was the only way to vent the anger that had accrued by her nosiness. Great auntie had the audacity (or the brass balls, whichever you want to call it) to step in between me and the physician's assistant when we were having a conversation about my granddaddy's decline. First, she got in my personal space, secondly she stuck her nose where it didn't belong. This is the same woman who brazenly called my grandmama several months ago, after visiting my granddaddy, to tell my grandmama that granddaddy didn't belong in the nursing home and that he didn't have alzheimers. Since when did she become an expert??? This is a seond go-round for me since my dad has it as well. I know it when I see and hear it. I wanted to go to her house and have a 'chat' with her but nooooooo, grandmama said it wouldn't be a good thing. I didn't want it to be a 'good' thing. She has not been a part of his medical history and doesn't know what we've been through. She just judged without facts.

There are so many issues with this I don't know where to continue to next. I know, I know, me getting upset with her isn't going to hurt anybody but myself. It's just a normal human reaction. I asked this woman to send me copies (at my expense too) of any pictures of her husband at any age (since he is granddaddy's only surviving brother). I haven't seen hide nor hair of those pics. My granddaddy has 2 surviving sisters and I haven't gotten anything from them either. I have never asked anything of these people and it wasn't just for me. I print them out and tack them to the wall in granddaddy's room for him. They seem to bring him some measure of comfort.

I'm too tired for a granddaddy medical update. It's going to be a long one when I get to it. With Christmas around the corner, I fear that my blogging will suffer. Hopefully I will be back tomorrow.

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